No, we're not talking about whose turn it is to change baby's diaper.
We're talking about the dramatic debate on the interwebs that's come about after a sex education expert named Deanne Carson went on Australia's ABC News and said that parents should teach their children about consent as early as possible, explaining how parents should, "set up a culture of consent in their homes. (Say to the baby) 'I'm going to change your nappy now. Is that okay?'" She further went on to explain that it's not like the baby needs to verbally respond. Essentially, it's about teaching them early to understand cues and letting them know their response has merit.
I don't know about you, but changing my daughter is a beginner's course in alligator wrestling.
We try everything from distracting her with toys, whispering so she strains to hear us and focuses on that rather than breaking free from the changing table. And what seems to work best is when we change her together and one pins her shoulders and one changes the diaper. Having said that, I totally get where Deanne was going with her comments. And I've read the same advice in Secrets of the Baby Whisperer (written by Tracy Hogg), which we'll talk more about in a moment.
Although my baby's changing routine can be challenging, I love the idea of talking to your baby and telling them what you're doing and saying "Ready for your diaper change?" no matter how young. So all these people in the comments section are riled up, "What next? Are you going to ask them for their permission to send them to school?" I think they might be missing the point. Since when does diaper changing need to involve disciplinary lessons? Possibly when they're toddlers, if they're throwing a tantrum, it might be time to set some diaper changing rules. But I would put the routine of a diaper change in the same category as a sort of a check-up at a doctor's office. Even as an adult, a doctor doesn't just invade your bodily space. My daughter's pediatrician (who is amazing) verbally walks her through the process, "Okay, mind if I listen to your heart now?" as he uses the stethoscope.
So I think Deanna, who is now taking a beating on social media from here to Australia, was describing a routine that teaches your baby, from the get-go, that their feelings matter and setting the stage for appropriate situations as you get older where an adult may need to invade your bodily space. And Deanne was clearly well-intentioned, wanting to offer any advice possible that in some small way, might save a child from abuse.
This brings me to one more thing I'd like to mention about the way we talk to and about each other on social media. Here's an interesting comparison. Deanna voiced her advice on a news program and it opened the flood gates for criticism and personal attacks on the internet. I read the exact same advice when I was pregnant (in Secrets of the Bay Whisperer by Tracy Hogg). I know many girlfriends who've read the book, and it's a highly revered book when it comes to advice for caring for your little ones. I doubt Tracy, who wrote the same thing in her book, received the same wrath. And I'm certain there's a greater number of people who've read her book than the number of people who've seen Deanne's interview. Just an interesting observation about the various platforms in which information and opinions are disseminated.
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